The 7 P’s of Smoking
One of my father-in-law’s (the Colonel) sayings is “Proper Prior Planning Prevents Piss-Poor Performance.” This admonition applies to nearly everything in life and it is certainly true in smoking meat. I was reminded of this the hard way recently when I set my sites on smoking a brisket. First of all, keep in mind that an 8 lb. brisket takes somewhere around 12 hours at 225 degrees (roughly 1.5 hrs. per pound), to smoke to tender and juicy perfection. Of course, there’s always going to be some prep time needed either the night before or first thing in the morning if you’re making a rub and then you also need to factor in the appropriate finish, like some time in the oven or a quick pan sear, followed by the all important rest for 30 minutes or so at the end of the process. The point is, there is a fair amount of strategic planning that goes into smoking something and just pulling a hunk of beef from the fridge and throwing it on the smoker is not going to lead to happy results.
My decidedly unhappy results not long ago are best explained in football terms which is the language we here at J Squared speak most fluently. First, keep in mind that I am still a complete rookie when it comes to smoking, but at least I had the sense to look at some websites and consult the Yoda of Smoke, my brother-in-law at Atlanta Grill Company, that spelled out temperature targets (both in the smoker and internal meat temp) and approximate smoke time. The problem is, I never developed an overall game plan as to how long all this might take because, as I noted above, there’s more to it than just tossing it on the grate and closing the lid. A good game plan requires that you not just execute certain specific plays, but that you envision the entire game – from start to finish. Let’s just say I fumbled the opening kick-off and failed to follow the 7 Ps.
With a Kamado Joe, or any other kamado-style smoker, you have to be cautious and deliberate when bringing it up to temperature. If you get it too hot, too soon, it’s pretty difficult to get it back down to the right temp and then hold it steady there. Establish your run game before you start throwing Hail Mary’s. The KJ is the offensive tackle of the smoking world . . . once that baby gets rolling down hill, it ain’t all that easy to get it turned around or stopped. This is in contrast to the shifty moves of a pellet smoker that allow you to quickly stop feeding the fire and change direction if needed.
In my case, I let my campfire (borderline pyromaniac) tendencies get the best of me. I generally go into any fire starting situation thinking flame, flame and more flame. But, alas, in smoking meat, you’re really not supposed to be building a campfire to dry wet boots next to. Unfortunately, that’s exactly what I ended up doing, so now I had to try and tamp down the flames and get the temperature back under control. With a modest degree of panic, I started closing vents and watched the temperature in the dome start to inch back down. But as I tried to level it out, I began worrying about my clock management. This temperature roller coaster had cost me valuable time that I had not accounted for and I realized at this pace, my brisket was going to be done somewhere around 1:30 a.m. the next morning.
Long story short – I had to punt on the whole project. Despite having prepared and applied a terrific rub the night before, wrapping and refrigerating the brisket overnight and then setting it on the counter for an hour or so in the morning, my fire fiasco meant that it was game over before the opening kick-off. There was no way it would be ready to serve when people were ready to eat. So, I re-wrapped the brisket, put it back in the fridge and would try again a few days later. I’m not sure how many of the 7 P’s I flunked throughout this episode, but I learned a couple of valuable lessons. No. 1: don’t get greedy when you start your fire. Allow plenty of time for the coals to slowly come to temp and then let it settle there. You are NOT speeding up the process by firing up an inferno and then trying to dial it back. No. 2: pencil in the time you want to serve and then count backwards to determine when you need to start all this activity. Like any good game plan, assume you’re going to have to call a few audibles along the way (e.g., add more charcoal) so build in some margin-for-errors time in your calculations.
Proper prior planning prevents (not only) piss poor performance, but it also avoids beans and weenies on short notice, when you had your eyes set on a nice hunk of beef.